4 months later...:-)

Well...I have problems keeping up in my written journal sometimes so it's really no surprise to me that I can't keep track of an electronic one...haha :).
Where has time gone?? I CANNOT believe that I am a little over a month from my last year of college...I'm having a difficult time moving one and fully comprehending this because it means that things are going to change. It's not that I dislike change; it's more that I don't want friends to leave, I don't want to be growing up this fast, and for the first time I am truly loving where God has me. I am surrounded by great friends, I enjoy college (not always the homework and the classes but you know, it's a once in a lifetime experience), I am growing and learning more about myself, and I am going to be really sad when this is all over. Don't get me wrong, I'll be excited to get into the real world too and discover what God has for me but to be perfectly honest, the future scares me.
Am I going to be a good teacher? Will I find a good grad school? Will I be able to pay off my loans? Will God bring a guy into my life? Where will I be 5 years from now? Will I still be in contact with all my friends?
I need to learn to fully trust in God. It is incredibly hard (still...haha) to let go and let God. I want to know what will happen and when it will happen but that really takes away the purpose of trusting God and having faith in him.
I'm living life to the fullest. I've been picking up new hobbies and am pretty adept at some of them if I do say so myself. Biggest obsession currently: ballroom dance. I LOVE it. And I'm a pretty good dancer. I've also been running again- which has always been a major stress reliever for me and fun, so I am extremely glad that I have started again. I also have picked up climbing. It's been a little rough on my hands but incredibly fun once I get the hang of it! I love the outdoors- so peaceful.
To end: I have awesome friends, a great family (who I miss A LOT), and am really enjoying life. God has blessed me beyond belief. I'm scared of the future but I am in his hands and I know I can't go wrong when I'm there.


Big Daddy Weave- Give Up, Let Go
Desperate. Grasping with a clenched fist.
I try to hold my own life in my own hand
Frustration sets in, thought I had this
Failure is the one thing that I can’t stand

Oh, You remind me that taking care of me
Was never in my job description.
Oh, now I’m finding You want
to fix it all
You’re just waiting for permission

I’m giving up, I’m letting go
Of everything that I’ve held onto
I’m giving up, I’m letting go
Of everything that I’ve let hold me
Far too long (for so long) Lord I know
I need to give You full control
Help me give up and let go

I want to trust You with my whole heart
Not lean on what I think I understand
And even when I can’t see
Jesus, help me still to believe
You’re unveiling an unfailing plan

Oh, but sometimes the old me creeps back in
Oh, and the only thing I know to do is give it all to You again

Help me give up, help me let go
Help me give up, help me let go
Help me give it all to You